EFFING THE INEFFABLE

Following is NOT like Backseat Driving

#followschool Mar 14, 2023

Someone asked me about the difference between following and backseat driving, and I think it's a fun opportunity to swerve over from a dance metaphor into a driving one.

Backseat driving is where you're judging how the driver is driving and attempting to control the car through controlling the driver. It's no fun for nobody.

You're not backseat driving if you put your headphones in and tune out for the ride, but you're also not following.

In the car, following means collaborating with the driver on creating a beautiful road trip experience. You choose a driver you trust, so you can relax and not judge their driving. You confirm the destination before you get in the car.

Then you look out the window, take pictures, enjoy the ride, open the driver's drinks and food for them, eat your own snackos, consult the map if and when they ask you, and make sure there's great music or podcasts coming through the speakers.

You might alter the course through your effusive desire to see the world's largest ball of yarn, but you're not telling the driver what to do. The driver is collaborating with you to create mutual delight and enjoyment on this road trip, so your desires matter to them.

In whatever realm, here's how you can tell if you're following--are you making art of your circumstances?